12.5.09

My humour is Wasted on You


I was reading funny poems
And wondered if I could write one
That's why I picked the pen and paper
But now ideas I have none.

Should I write about the Rivers Known?
Or The Wanderer's great expeditions?
But isn't the Little Girl Lost? The Wanderer gone for a walk?
On what am I to base this huge sensation?

Should I write about bluetooth-enabled zits?
Or would arse-kissing bees work wonders?
I was thinking about incorporating pirate humour
When suddenly all thoughts split and lay asunder!

For I heard a distant muffled cry
Darn! It's he who's calling
It's the hysterical Chicken Little again
And dammit! The sky's falling!

What do I do? Where do I go?
There's no place to run.
And what'll happen to my poem?
The blessed thing is still undone

The blasted sky was falling fast 
I ran hither-thither and I ran helter-skelter
 The only that still wasn't in sight
Was a blessing in disguise- a shelter!

I could find no way out
I cried, I shouted, I wailed but in vain
 And in the midst of all this commotion
The poem was all but forgotten

Now death was approaching and I was helpless
And my nails I began to nibble
But then I realised- It wasn't the sky that was falling. No.
I had just pulled up the hood of my Lamborghini Gallardo  Convertible 

 Anyways: Now I've decided to give up poetry
And my attempt at humour too
What is the point of writing anything,
When my humour is wasted on you!

____________________________________________________________
Author's note: The due credit of the title of this post goes to 'Rhea'lity who keeps lamenting about how her 'humour is wasted' on us lesser mortals.
As for the fact that this might have been the  lamest poem you've ever read...well, blame it on my holidays! I have nothing to do and ideas just don't strike you like Pathan's sixes when you do nothing apart from watching IPL matches and sleep.

39 comments:

Gulabo Chamanbhahar said...

loved it!! (kakolie)

Kriti said...

Thank you Kakoilie di!!

Never knew you blogged too!!

And Gulabo Chamanbahar.. WOW!!
ROFL.. literally!!


Hope to see you around more.
Cheers!

Gayathri said...

wow! even your musings on the so-called 'nothing' turned out to be a rhyming one,(if you dont want it to be called poetic!)..
Anyway,it was a lot better than writing about the rivers known or the wanderings or whatever...

Onward said...

hehe...who says its wasted on us?...i m like already bored at work..but ur poem just made me smile..hehe...chicken lil eh kriti..hmmmm

Oh btw can i take the convertible out for a spin...never had a chance with a lamborgini gallardo ;-)

Real funny poem yaar..i toh enjoyed it immensely..totally different from your usual work..;-)

Chalo now atleast u r making some use of ur vacations...this def seemed like a yusuf pathan sixer...;-)

luv
amith

died a thousand deaths while reading this said...

don't care about the poem or my reference in it...just wanted to say that the profile picture looks as if you're already dead...like as if you were just drowned in a bath tub and somebody threw a hair dryer in it (plugged in, mind you) in which case, your ghost wrote this poem to which i can just say two things:
1. Your demise is one of the better things in my life.
2. Your ghost writes better than the living you.

Gagan said...

What an enjoyable post to start off the day :)

I liked the flow and the easiness here (remember Eidolon:P)

Keep writing :)

Aniket Thakkar said...

I see now you've left me outof da party! I guess we're even now. :D :D

And I love the idea of inserting blog names to a poem... its pure genius! But who invented it... hmm... lemme guess... oh yes! ME!!!

And you have to insert death in everything don't you? Though I always use this name for id but perhaps you are more entitled to be called 'Deathstalker' :D

A jolly read indeed. :D

Aakash Aggarwal said...

nice experiment...

it works. I quite enjoyed it. And the annotations reminded me of a certain someone who is very fond of the same!

aupsy said...

lol...this is awesome... thinking about what to write in a poem can turn into a poem itself... with u anything and everythin is possible...

i bow...

Kriti said...

@ Gayathri

Hahaha!
Well, the idea was just to write something random... That's all. I'm glad it was appreciated.

Thank you so much.
:-)

Kriti said...

@ Amith

Well, mission accomplished!
Yeahh.. sure.. don't forget to take me along.. ;-)

This is 'use' of my vacations...
erm.. ok. if you say so!
lol..

Cheers!!

Amritorupa Kanjilal said...

of course kriti, how could you leave out the marquis his lordship la don gujju?

well, you started without ideas, without punch lines, but you seemed to not have let that hold you back... good shot girl, you made a lot of people titter :)

i loved 'hysterical chicken little' :D

Kriti said...

@ Rhea

ROFLMAO!!


Alright.. will change the pic..

Well... let's hope this ghost pays regular visits.. atleast i was paraised in death if not in life..

:-)

Kriti said...

@ Gagan

Remember the promise that I made after Eidolon? ;-)

So, here I am with an 'easy' poem..

Glad you liked it!!

Cheers!!

Kriti said...

@ Aniket

I did not leave you out!!

I've mentioned your ass-kissing bee!!!

In fact, that is what got me started... I read that... then I looked up some more funny poetry and was finally compelled to write this!

I've already called Maitre d'Poesie.... aur kya chahiye?!?!

I LIKE Deathstalker!!
Gee!!

I'm all smiles! :-)

Cheers!!

Kriti said...

@ Aakash

Glad you enjoyed!!

You make it a point to bring either 'him' or the 'other him' into the picture anyhow, don't you?

Lol!!!

Thanks for visiting.
:-)

Kriti said...

@ Ayush

Arre... this was to random crap re.. It's not difficult to turn random thoughts into poetry.. and who'd know better than you..

anyways, thanku thanku!!

Appreciation is welcome, anyday!!

Kriti said...

@ LGL

Arre baba!! I didn't leave him out!! I've included his ass-kisser re!!

Why doesn't anybody notice that?
:-(

You bet I'm glad it was appreciated!!

Hehe.. i like him.. he's so cute!

P.S.: I like your moniker for Aniket better that his own! ;-)

The Wanderer said...

hehehe... lame but it has my name.. so i hope it touches heights of fame!...

(wrote it just to tell u: lamer things exist!!)

Kriti said...

@ Nishi

They do.. they definitely do!!!

Now I know!! lol!!


Thanks for dropping by! :-)

CRD said...

haha! this was really funny :P


Wonder if u cud get any funnier :P


Good Job :)

AP said...

Which means you had ideas when you picked up your pen (Seriously? Do you really write on paper? I thought you more oftne than not typed...) to write?
And what's this short term memory thingie? You had ideas, and you forgot them as soon as you "picked the pen and paper"?
Your life fell apart because of a puny little chicken? Chicken!
Some chicken little indeed! What's happened to your eyesight? Couldn't distinguish between a convertible roof and a chicken-induced-falling-sky? Pooh! Bah!
And quite wasted, let me assure you. I'm quivering with indignation!
Really, quite an epic simile in the end! "...like Pathan's sixes..."...well done!

Kriti said...

Good heavens, Anubhav! Don't you ever get tired?

Unknown said...

d poem wasn't really humurous bt still i lovd it lyk d rest of ur kreations....
gr8 wrk sharma....!!!!

Kriti said...

Thank you for stopping by, Prerna.
(I won't say anything else here. We can discuss our private matters elsewhere.)

Somebody you know said...

yea.. it was!!

Kriti said...

@ Somebody who claims I know I him/her.


Well. You proved my point. Thank you!

One who proved you right said...

LOL!! How did I prove your point? You never tried your humour on me!!

I just said you are right about the others you tried it on!

LOL!

Deepa Gopal said...

O Kriti...I loved it...the humor isn't wasted dear:)
Loved your style n the innovative insertion of links.

Good work!

anandi said...

Its soothing that I happened to visit another Artist's blog. I don't know why but the poem shows your "phlegmatic and apathetic" mood.
:-)

Kriti said...

@ Anand

I'm glad you liked my blog.

Artist? Hmm...

I haven't yet thought of calling myself that. I was quite content with 'weirdo'. Nonetheless, thank you so much for calling me that. It is certainly a huge compliment! :-)


As for the 'apathetic and phlegmatic attitude'.. Well, I've been working quite hard to achieve it. So, guess it showed finally!

You're an excellent observer to have deduced that when no one else could!

anandi said...

Hey did u see this on Dovesdolphins?
:P
http://anandi.blogspot.com/2009/05/dovesdolphins.html

Beautiful Mind ! said...

I was reading funny poems
And wondered if I could write one
That's why I picked the pen and paper
But now ideas I have none...
its very true line it always happening with me...
u have nice compiled lines..
Good work!! keep it up ...:)

Kriti said...

@ Sapna

Nice to see you here.

Well, generally, poetry comes best when it is not forced. So, next time, just let the thoughts flow and I'm sure you'll be very happy with the rssults.

Do stick around.
Take care.
Cheers!

Kriti said...

@ Deepa


My sincere apologies for missing your comment earlier... my internet has been giving me a lot of trouble!!

Thank you so much for loving the lame attempt!!
The idea for insertion of links, of corse, came from 'dearest' Aniquez de los mil luces.

;-)

Thank you for visiting!!

Amal Bose said...

its really great !!!

Kriti said...

@ Amal

Glad you liked it.
Do stick sround! :-)

hammy said...

Ran hither thither, did you?
And then helter skelter too!
You went the whole nine yards
Tickling as you're used to do.

You say your humor is awaste;
That it's utterly wasted on me
And here I thought I got them all
Going ha-ha-ha, he-he

Without doubt this is startling
It shakes me to the core
To think that there may be layers
of deeper jokes I ne'er got before

This simply would not have done
Your posts I needed to review
To scrutinize the hidden puns
I surely must get a clue

Of course the review was fun
It was great to read again
But I laughed at the same places
To read deeper, I should train

If your humor's wasted on me
I'll try to be more alert;
More agile at catching jokes
A quip fielder, I assert

For now, this comment should serve
To thank you once more
I really enjoyed the read,
which is why I say - 'Encore!'

Kriti said...

@ Hamish

Wow. Simply wow!

I'm so happy you read it once
Heck! I'm happier you read it twice.
Though, trust me, I'm happiest
Because you didn't read it thrice.

For if you had done that,
I'm sure I would've lost my sleep.
Reading the poem thrice would've
Revealed, it's just a trash heap.

I've written better poems that
Should've catapulted me to fame.
But no, it's this Keation that gets me famous
A poem that's undeniably lame.

But thank you so much for the Hidden puns; a novel comment.
I hope that your visits now
Will be a regular event.