The Daughter They Never Wanted

I am alive, my soul is dead,
There’s a terrible pain in my heart,
Rational thoughts evict my mind,
I wonder- “Where did it all start?”

Was it the day he left me?
For reasons he could not tell,
No, I knew this was coming,
It was something I did foretell.

Was it when I failed
That I became so disheartened?
No, I know this isn’t true,
Those were testing times from which I learnt.

Was it that day-
When I first did drugs?
No, I think not!
And I continue with a shrug.

Was it when I left home?
And vowed never to return,
After all, I’m an adventurous soul,
And I know that was just for fun.

Or was it when
My kid brother was born?
No, it couldn’t have been,
Though I was left forlorn.

Was it when as a little girl
I stole that pencil from a classmate?
I got a good thrashing later, but
That was just an indication of my fate.

No, no, these are trivial instances,
I know where exactly it all started.
It was the day ‘I’ was born-
The daughter they never wanted!

Yet they kept me, raised me,
In an environment full of tension.
Oh! Why they couldn’t understand?
All I needed was love and affection!

Money, freedom and luxuries of life,
Were things I always had.
A warm hug, a pat on the back
I missed; and that made me sad.

All the money couldn’t buy me
A simple, caring friend,
A sweet, loving family.
But it’ll get me to my end.

My hand’s bleeding profusely,
I guess the cut’s just enough,
Parting from a daughter they never wanted,
For my parents, won’t be tough.

I’ve heard that from up there
Simply exquisite is the view!
Look out for me, I’d shout from there
That- “Mum! I love you!”